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[personal profile] devi
As some of you might remember, I was at my cousin's wedding in Kerry a few weeks ago. As I was stumbling back down the aisle after the interminable ceremony, punch-drunk from the assault of hyper-Catholicism (did you know that the full version of the Catholic wedding vows requires you to promise not to use contraception, which my cousin blithely did?), I found this on the bookshelves at the back among piles of The Irish Catholic newspaper:





Wow, I thought. The Church are sufficiently on the ball to produce a parents' guide aimed specifically at old-school punks (of [livejournal.com profile] modalverben's vintage, perhaps) who have settled down after their wild youth and are dealing with parenthood. And sure enough, inside I found concerned letters like these:

"Despite all my efforts to get my son into the Pistols and the Clash, he insists on filling his ears with commercial, manufactured chart-pap. What can I do to save him from this vile and dangerous habit?"

"All my daughter wants is a job at Citibank, working her way up the financial ladder, and all the designer trainers she can wear at the weekends. I have done my best to teach her right from wrong. Where have I messed up?"

"While cleaning my son's room, under the mattress I discovered a stash of literature from the Conservative Party. I fear he may have joined it in secret. How do I broach this awkward subject?"

Of course, Father Paul Andrews (S.J.), writer for The Sacred Heart Messenger magazine, handled all these questions adroitly and soothingly. The world needs more people like Father Paul.

Date: 2004-10-20 04:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] modalverben.livejournal.com
Oh my word, the chap on the left looks exactly like the drummer in an old band of mine. Without the mohican I hasten to add.

Date: 2004-10-20 04:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bateleur.livejournal.com
Maybe I'm horribly mistaken, but isn't that 'chap' a girl ?

Date: 2004-10-20 05:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] verlaine.livejournal.com
You are clearly unschooled in the ways of punk!

(Though I thought so too.)

Date: 2004-10-20 05:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] alfaguru.livejournal.com
There's one for Trisha:

"I thought I was gay until I found out all the chaps I'd slept with were girls"

Date: 2004-10-20 06:09 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] elethe.livejournal.com
Well, if he's not a girl why has he got bosoms?

Date: 2004-10-20 06:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ravenblack.livejournal.com
They actually belong to the red-haired one, which is a girl.

Date: 2004-10-21 05:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] modalverben.livejournal.com
Oh hell, sorry, what a dimwit.

Oh my word, the chap on the right looks exactly like the drummer in an old band of mine. Without the mohican I hasten to add.

Duh.

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