Implausible Occurrences (#1 in an occasional series)

[devi]

Scene: Cold December evening. bluedevi is cycling along Blackbird Leys Road. A group of LADS are walking along the footpath on the far side of the road.

LADS: Show us yer tits!
bluedevi: Okay.
(She stops the bike, gets off and parks it. She removes her hat, the bag slung across her, her full-length coat and scarf, then takes off her big woolly jumper and her T-shirt and unhooks her bra, putting everything in a neat pile on the grass verge.)
bluedevi: What do you think?
LADS (nodding): Yeah, they're tits all right.
(bluedevi puts everything back on and cycles away.)

Comments

[dyddgu.livejournal.com]

*round of applause*

[bluedevi.livejournal.com]

This, of course, never happened, but 'what if I did what they said?' entertained me all the way into town :)

[dyddgu.livejournal.com]

I did once, as it happened, do something similar. I replied that I would if they'd buy me a beer. they said alright. I kept my end of the bargain, and they bought me a beer :-)

[bluedevi.livejournal.com]

You are HARDCORE.

[dyddgu.livejournal.com]

Either that, or desperate for beer ;-)

[dyddgu.livejournal.com]

Actually, my last comment was not as amusing as the time when I got accosted by some LADS who asked if their mate could put his face in my cleavage. Which he did. I then removed him with the words "I've got two tits in there, I don't need a third..."

[stiofan.livejournal.com]

*laughs*
Excellent!

[fluffymormegil.livejournal.com]

*giggle*

[ar-gemlad.livejournal.com]

The way you've written LADS in capitals makes me think it should stand for something...

[bluedevi.livejournal.com]

Less-Abled Denizens of Suburbia?

[philipstorry.livejournal.com]

Losers And Desperate Sods?

[bluedevi.livejournal.com]

Okay, you win :)

[juggzy.livejournal.com]

Heh.

[bateleur.livejournal.com]

Maybe they were assuming you had a photograph of your tits about your person.

Or maybe not.

[bluedevi.livejournal.com]

Hmm, I must carry one from now on in case this situation arises...

[alfaguru.livejournal.com]

[the-maenad.livejournal.com]

YAY Branestawm icon!

[angeluspealing.livejournal.com]

This has given me my biggest laugh all week. I thank you.

[davefish.livejournal.com]

Its important to have these things checked you know, its all part of the war against terrorism (Could be fake tits loaded with plastic explosive you know, underwiring or firing mechanism, who can tell?)

[bluedevi.livejournal.com]

thecesspit once told me I had Stealth Tits. I can't remember how or why.

[hairyears.livejournal.com]

Somehow, that isn't quite a compliment.

[bluedevi.livejournal.com]

It wasn't anything as simple as that they were invisible!

[thecesspit.livejournal.com]

I highly expect I had been drinking when I mentioned it, but it's true, she does.

[caescarna.livejournal.com]

Talk about implausible - surely you'd lock your bike to something on Blackbird Leys Road ??? :P

Alternative ending #2

[vardebedian.livejournal.com]

LADS: Show us yer tits!
bluedevi: Okay.
(She stops the bike, gets off and parks it. She removes her hat, the bag slung across her, her full-length coat and scarf, then takes off her big woolly jumper and her T-shirt and unhooks her bra, putting everything in a neat pile on the grass verge.)
bluedevi: What do you think?
LADS (nodding): OK, they're defintely tits. But how we can be sure they're yours?
bluedevi: errr...

Re: Alternative ending #2

[bluedevi.livejournal.com]

Oh, I'm sure some well-judged wobbles would demonstrate the absence of silicone.

I've said too much.

[mollydot.livejournal.com]

GIC